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06:14pm 01/09/2004
  hey bitch

get over it
 
     

(3 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
venom mend the heartttttttttttt   
02:29pm 19/08/2004
  I have one thing to say...

I love V M T H forever & ever & everrrrrr!
east coast bitches for life! haha ♥
 
     

(3 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
white nails and black hearts   
11:47am 16/08/2004
 
mood: cold
I haven't updated in so many months jezzzz. hmm.. I'm thinking I'm going to start updating again...

Well last night I went to the boardwalk with keith and stephen. Keith promised me hand-painted roses for this valentines day. I'm excited to get them considering I've never gotten anything from a boy on that day. haha what a loser.
The night before I slept over vickis with heather and tabathaaa. vmth represent bitches ♥ haha We played monopoly and had a massive food fight in her living room slash kitchen slash bathroom. hahah Tomatos, syrup, SOAP, cookies, shaving cream, bugspray<33 We had fun I love themmm oh so muchhh. Then vicki & I went shopping and I got clothes including a really neat sweater. I want to hang out with billy tonight because I haven't seen him in about 48 hours damnit

♥ Mackenzieee
 
     

(What's love?)

 
   
11:37am 17/05/2004
  I dangle my feet over the docks
because if it takes me
you come too.
the trees bend in a way I've never seen before
the sky seen through patches of branches alive
& frame my lack of boundries
Please don't ever set them
we've too far to go
and too little time to get there
 
     

(1 beautiful imperfection | What's love?)

 
letters fall too fast   
11:18am 18/04/2004
 
mood: drained
You might have reminded me

but I never really knew who I was

they glanced sideways in public

and held hands in the kitchen

and had sex on the couch

and she had short black hair

and his hair was longer than hers

and nothing was wrong

he never listened anyway

*

I need to find his imperfections
before it's too late
before I run again
I hope he doesn't understand me like you do
because love hides from idenity
and I'm so afraid I might fall
and I'm even more afraid that you might be there to catch me

- mq

I'm using up all my heartbeats on you
 
     

(1 beautiful imperfection | What's love?)

 
   
03:56pm 21/03/2004
   
     

(1 beautiful imperfection | What's love?)

 
sloppy stars   
07:34pm 18/03/2004
  lamp
such.great.heightsCollapse )
 
     

(1 beautiful imperfection | What's love?)

 
random, unorganized, overdue, overasked for... photos =]   
05:27pm 17/03/2004
 
mood: disappointed

lamp
the.district.sleeps.alone.tonightCollapse )
 
     

(4 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
   
07:36pm 15/03/2004
 
one minute past forever in this rasberry sherbert sunset
orange flecked upon the flatlined clouds
the sun hidden, saying turquoise goodbyes
& asking "Will you miss me when I'm gone?"
I'll whisper my response, "Always."
"I'll miss your warm arms and your copper smile."
only a matter of time
 
     

(What's love?)

 
if there was never a beginning then there'll never be an end   
05:09pm 12/03/2004
 
mood: ---
I'm only so far beyond the clock
in times where this does exist
where every color is a little brighter
and every ray of sunlight is a little warmer
& nothing will ever be missed,
wouldn't you want to share this world
with kids who're smarter than their fathers
and glasses half full
and where stop signs no longer exist,
a world of beautiful criminals
 
     

(2 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
addressed & redressed   
06:49pm 08/03/2004
 
mood: happy
I miss the summer's freedom
but this new snow's given me something to smile about
I'm almost out of answers
when none of them pertain to my expressions' questions
my tears don't fall as often
but this weathers too dry without them
unclueless to the given proposition that this is meant to be
it's just denial
it's just wishful thinking
and I'm just waiting for an unbroken seashell
a brand new start
a silver lining to this heart
 
     

(3 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
shimmer in your locks   
05:57pm 07/03/2004
 
mood: -




I'm 16 years under fallen stars
and waving hello to the clouds
because I'm not ready to leave yet
I take back what I said
I do love this place you've given me, I do, I do
I promise to smile more
I promise to make you smile more
let me show you what makes you shine so
brighter then the glitter on her broken face
more dazzling then the ocean's break
more iridescent then the most stunning pearl
the most beautiful sparkle,
in our entire curious world



"Cast your eyes on the ocean, cast your soul to the sea, when the dark nights seem endless, please remember me."

-I can't, I won't stop</3 please comment, I'm feeling lonely =]
 
     

(5 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
   
10:26am 04/03/2004
  so much paper with nothing to say
but these thoughts that spill out like disease
every inch of every letter dripping with anticipation
for your answers and victories
over something you blocked for so long
with these broken hearts and these torn emotions
I congradulate you with all of my nothing
a wish for clarity is far from a star
when we look from our dead rooftops
 
     

(3 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
   
09:35am 04/03/2004
  Current mood: indifferent
Current music: absolutely nothing
Current taste: im eating my tongue<3
Current hair: down, flipped, normal
Current clothes: tshirt, tank top, jeans
Current annoyance: having to find something to do for an hour in here
Current smell: so pink from gap<33
Current thing I ought to be doing: sleeping
Current windows open: this
Current favorite band: um..damn, theres so many, I have time lemme see if i can name a couple off the top of my head...
thice, rufio, saosin, sublime, thought riot, rx bandits<33, dashboard[yeah yeah fucking shoot me], mae, I can't think
Current book: julius ceasar, farenhiet{I have no idea how to spell that} 451, tales from earthsea, spares, when the wind blows for the 50 millionth time
Current cd in stereo: rxb
Current crush: uh, does it matter?
Current favorite celeb: e woods<33 ahh, um, jude law.
Current hate: boredom, some dumb kids um..

=Do I=
Smoke?: not anymore
Do drugs?: above
Had sex?: nope
Have a dream that keeps coming back?: sometimes,
Remember your first love?: -
Read the newspaper?: in journalism class
Have any gay or lesbian friends?: not that i know of
Believe in miracles?: we'll see
Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?: I'm not sure
Consider yourself tolerant of others?: if it's someone I really care about..
Consider love a mistake?: no
Like the taste of alcohol?: some
Have a favorite candy?: sweedish fish, thats not a candy ha
Believe in astrology?: ehh, no
Believe in magic?: sometimes
Believe in god?: undecided
Have any pets: dog/dexter, cat/tikila, my rat Brutus<3, 2 bunnies/-
Go to or plan to go to college: yea im planning on going
Have any piercings?: yeah, nose, belly button, ears
Have any tattoos?: not yet
Hate yourself: no,
Have an obsession?: maybe
Have a secret crush?: ha,
Do they know yet?: if it secret Im assuming thatd be a negitive
Wish on stars?: all the time
Care about looks?: yes, somewhat. inner beauty's more important but if you dont take the time to take care of yourself that that shows too
=Love life=
First crush: oh man, I dont even know
First kiss: aboveee, how rediculous am I, haha
Single or attached?: 1st choice
Ever been in love?: someone thinks I have.. ha
Do you believe in love at first sight?: yes
Do you believe in "the one?": yess
Describe your ideal significant other: I love all kinds of boys, haha. um...dark hair, deffinately, maybe black, long, freckles somewhere/love them, tall, good kisser, obsessiviness is a downerr, sweet, compassionate, loves to write, "DEEP"right girls? hahah, loving, affectionate, piercings/tattoos, they'll all wonderful ha

=Juicy stuff=
Have you ever played a game that required removal of clothing?: probably
Have you ever been intoxicated?: ha, um, Id have to go with yes on that one
Favorite place to be kissed?: closets, floors, cars, trees, the library, anywhere<33
Have you ever been caught "doing something?": haha, neverrr, not me
Are you a tease?: I think everyones been called a tease at least once in their life, but no, I don't think I am
make the first move?: why not

--APPEARANCE:--
Hair: brown, blondish, strawberrish, next week itll be black or purple, I dont know
Eyes: dark brown
Height: 5'8/9ish

--LAST THING YOU:--
Bought: frames at the rag shop
Ate & Drank: banana, pasta at jills, water
Read: another lj
Watched on tv: something at jillians house

--WHO DO YOU WANT TO:--
kill: you
get really wasted with: if i were to, i'd say my friends & hot kids
look like: that girl from underworld hahah
be like: no one in particular


--LAST PERSON YOU--
talked to: larissa
hugged: josh
instant messaged: stef
kissed: haha ---

--WHERE DO YOU--
eat: off the floor
cry: anywhere

--HAVE YOU EVER...--
Dated one of your best friends? negitive
Loved somebody so much it makes you cry? fuck you
alcohol? yeahh
Done drugs? maybe
Broken the law? sure
Run away from home? actually no
Broken a bone? nope
Played Truth Or Dare? yea
Kissed someone you didn't know? yes, haha
Been in a fight? nah
Come close to dying? dont think so

--WHAT IS:--
The most embarrassing CD in your collection?: general public ahah
Your bedroom like?: a MESS, I love it, hah
Your favorite restaurant?: I dk

--NUMBER--
of times i have had my heart broken: -
of hearts i have broken: a few
of guys ive kissed: like 10 maybe
of girls ive kissed: hahah
of tight friends: some great girls
of cds i own: i dont know they are all over the place
of scars on my body: a lot
of things that i regret: some

--YOUR THOUGHTS--
I know: I lie to myself sometimes
I want: a guy
I have: a heart<3
I wish: things worked out differently
I hate: saddness
I fear: being alone
I hear: nothing
I search: for the truth
I wonder: about people, alot
i regret: -
I love: a few things

--RANDOM QUESTIONS--
What's on your bedside table?: a lot of junk, books, clock, phone, earings, notes, food
What do you eat when you raid the fridge late at night? cookies, crackers
your secret guaranteed weeping movie?: suburbia
could have plastic surgery, what would you have done?: ?
your biggest fear?: being alone
What feature are you most insecure about?: stomach, thighs
Are you a pyromaniac?: no
Do you have too many love interests?: no
Crushes? shut up?
do you know anyone famous?: no
Describe your bed: lots of color, and pillows
Spontaneous or plain?: deffinately spontaneous
Do you know how to play poker?: not really
What do you carry with you at all times?: eveything I own in one of those huge bags I have! hha
How do you drive?: i dont
What do you miss most about being little?: playing in the mud, oh wait, I still do that
Are you happy with your given name?: yes
much money would it take to get you to give up the Internet for one year?: umm alot, actually i dont think i could do it
What was the last song you were listening to?: rxb mastering the list
talk a lot?:yes
you like yourself and believe in yourself?: sometimes
nk you're cute?: no
Do poor, homeless, or starving people sometimes annoy you? not al all
Do you consider yourself to be a nice person?: eh
Do you spend more time with your boyfriend, or your friends?: Im always with my friends
What is the first thing you think when you see two gay guys or lesbians holding hands?: I dont understand why some people won't accept them
 
     

(What's love?)

 
for the love of timeliness   
05:43pm 01/03/2004
 
mood: apathetic
Lots & lots of overdue pictures =]

lamp

..Hope screams out for life In the vein of choice; And each to his own..Collapse )
 
     

(5 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
Inhaling the Storm Clouds   
10:43pm 26/02/2004
 
mood: numb
I love this so I'm posting it again

my blood runs grey
the grey base of the gravel road
shinning through like sunlight
or rain
things change so rapidly
I didn't have time to prepare
even though I felt this hurricane approach
I miss you more than ever now
but this forced emotion doesn't care how I feel
and these tears are dry on the apples of my cheeks
and on the slope of my neck
no longing rolling over my chin
but frozen in time
just like the moments we had
what we had
I miss you more than ever now
and this lump in my throat is not growing smaller
and the color is not coming back to my eyes
I've inhaled the storm clouds
and they don't wish to escape
they're settling in my body
and growing so fucking cold
& I miss you more than I ever have before
because I know I won't ever sleep in your arms again
& this new tear
this new tear
is tiny with regret
and filled with you
and I'm letting it go
I'm sorry I'm letting go
but I know how,

because you've taught me


I wish I still meant the world to you.

"I've always feared silence the most, because the more there is of it, the more your mind makes up it's own things to hear. And sometimes, you don't want to hear what it has to say."
 
     

(3 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
overview   
09:08pm 25/02/2004
 
mood: accomplished
Birthday was good. Friday played field hockey; won 10-1, took a trip to the mall and chilled at Stef's the rest of the night which was alot of fun. Saturday was vonderful with a v. Dukes, lykosh, brit, ali, kole rae, rissa, and quack came over, we ate & then I drove us to Marissa's casa. That's house in spanish right? anyway. Hung out with 'geary', lance, jay, ray, and some good kids; went to rays for a little, then slept at rissas which I might add had no parentals included. :) Junk went down with Ali, she's all better now. We love you Quizno. Sunday I worked, and that was, well, work. Picked up Brutis on monday, he's a baby & I love him. He says hello. Tuesday was that fashion show which I didn't think met anyone that went's expectations. Oh well, got a cute hat though. Friday the girls & I are going to support the wrestlers at east I believe. I'm making a shirt now for Geary, yay. Should be fun; I'm still new at this, being a full-fledged central supporter, I'll learn. ha

These pics are all from saturday night. I don't think my birthday would have rocked so much without these girls. I lavhee youuuu chickasss!

Shiny Disco Balls?Collapse )
 
     

(10 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
I miss you.   
12:35pm 24/02/2004
 
Tribulation of universes
will never fracture this admiration
No such syntax will restrain
such things that I need not feel
forever & a day ago
eyes illuminated with lime fireflies
something I would not feel
fidelity sprung from stagnant winter
no longer are the lilacs wilting
for they blossum in debt to the sun
creating something I desperately wanted to feel
 
     

(1 beautiful imperfection | What's love?)

 
two letter nicknames...   
02:25pm 23/02/2004
 
mood: lonely
Is it alright for me to miss you?
maybe you're reading this,
you check this sometimes don't you?
say something if you are..

& this is self-explanatory..

lamp
 
     

(14 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)

 
junk   
05:26pm 18/02/2004
 
mood: bnflkjbsd



.....Collapse )
 
     

(3 beautiful imperfections | What's love?)